Wet blankets on ice water challenges

Today on social media, I read two different negative articles about the Ice Water Challenges that seem to have taken America by storm and I have to tell you, I’m annoyed.  Only in America would people bitch about something that is supposed to be a good thing that supports others.  Whether it be about the delivery, people’s intentions, or God knows what else, people are complaining about it.  That seems to be the American way.  Forget the good that it’s doing – let’s find something to kvetch about from my comfy couch while I do absolutely nothing to contribute to the greater good.  Or better yet, my contribution to the greater good is better than yours, so I can be judgmental and criticize it.

One of the chief complaints is that people are not drawing enough attention to the cause they are supporting.  My response to that is – how are they hurting the cause?  Does it really matter that John is only doing the challenge so he can be shirtless on camera and show off his abs, or Tiffany just wants to look noble in front of her country club friends and neither are educating me on what the cause is about?  I couldn’t give a rat’s ass less.  They’re publicly saying, “this organization is worthy of my help” and that’s enough for me.  Then there’s the domino effect.  These two do the challenge – then challenge their friends, let’s say four total, then those four each challenge four, then those sixteen each challenge four…. Well, you get the idea.  Much like an unaltered cat will multiply (please, spay and neuter!), so did this challenge and the good it’s doing.  And frankly, it kind of did my soul good to see so many people get behind something positive for a change.  Who am I to judge if they have ulterior motives?  I don’t care about Mr. and Mrs. Smith’s intentions when they show up to a charity fundraiser.  If they’re there to hobknob, promote a “good side” to the press, show constituents they care about the people, impress their boss, win over their daughter’s future in-laws, or meet another couple they can swing with – I DON’T CARE.  They showed up, they donated money, and they legitimized the cause.

Another grievance is that so many people are opting to do the challenge and not donate.  Okay, here are my two issues with that.  1) OF COURSE they’re doing the challenge – otherwise you probably wouldn’t know about it and 2) every video I have seen, the people are saying they are donating some amount to some cause – although ALS research seems to be the celebrity beneficiary, two of the charities that are dear to my heart (LEWC and SaveThePetsAZ) have been local recipients.  How is this a bad thing?  “Well, how many are REALLY donating what they say they will?”  I don’t know – and again, I DON’T CARE.  I’m betting on the fact that they made a video for the world to see – including the charity they are supporting – and said they are going to donate will be motivation enough for them to follow through.  But, as in life, there are going to be people who don’t keep their word.  Hopefully the people they called out will at least keep theirs and hence, they still helped in some small way.  In animal rescue, we know people back out all the time from commitments they make (agreeing to foster, pledging money to help with vet care, donating food, etc.) but the MAJORITY come through.  I’ll take 10 people publicly saying they’re going to do something and only have eight come through than four people privately saying it and following through ANY day.  That’s what this challenge is – a numbers game.  By calling out 1,000 people who may have never contributed and even getting only a 75% return, that’s still 75% more than there was.  And even if they can't afford to donate, this provides a way for them to show support; where's the harm in that?

And finally, the water wasting…. Unless you’ve never played in the hose, let your shower run to “get warm,” taken a bath, swam in a pool, rewashed the clothes in the washer because you forgot about them, let the water run while brushing your teeth, or emptied your cooler full of water and ice after your trip to the beach is over, you really need to shut the hell up about this one.  

In short, I’m in a bit of a tizzy about this because people are taking something positive and actively looking to find something negative about it when there is ZERO gain to be had in finding something bad and so much to be reaped in finding the good.

My testimony

I’ve been really forthcoming in sharing my story in person but recently, I had someone ask me to put it in writing.  That’s not as easy as I initially thought it was going to be…

Four years ago I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis after an episode of optic neuritis.  I immediately began (very expensive) medication, changed my diet, changed my attitude, but tried to remain as ‘normal’ as possible.  For the first six months of giving myself an injection every other day, I would bawl.  I was scared of needles, the shots hurt and I would make myself so upset about an hour before having to do one because I just dreaded it so much.  My optic neuritis subsided but I was still exhausted all the time.  Some days it took everything I had just to make it to work and back before collapsing until it was time to get up the next day and do it all over.  I slowly started feeling better.  I lost some weight and was allowing myself to be hopeful because I hadn’t had another flare; maybe this wasn’t a death sentence?  I was still having ‘MS days’ where I would get very tired and my equilibrium would be off but for the most part, I functioned pretty normally.  I got more used to the shots and I gave myself permission to tell people no and to take a nap when I needed one, regardless if there were dishes in the sink.  

In June of 2012, I came to Michigan for the summer like I always do and was introduced to It Works’ “Crazy Wrap Thing” and Greens.  Naturally, I loved how the products made me look (awesome! :-)) but I also noticed how great I felt.  I returned to Tucson in August and immediately went to my massage therapist; I hadn’t seen her since May and I’m used to seeing her monthly for eight years.  Of course she noticed how great I looked but as she was giving me my treatment, she asked me, “What is going on with your inflammation??”  Nervously, I asked her to clarify.  She said, “It’s so reduced!”  “Well,” I said, “I think it’s the Wraps and Greens.  The Wrap reduces inflammation and increases circulation and Greens balances my pH and alkalizes me.”  Her only reply was, “Wow, it’s working.”  (and then she became a distributor because she was so impressed.)

Five months later I went to my bi-annual neurologist appointment.  I always dreaded these, I was convinced that he was going to find something new and pull the rug out from under me.  He never did but I would feel discouraged and depressed because of what he didn’t say (‘You’re cured!)  This time he said the closest thing to it when he asked, “Why am I seeing you so often?” Followed by, “You’re doing great; I don’t think I need to see you more than once a year anymore.” (Of course, then he did the caveat, ‘should anything change, you need to contact me immediately,’ yada yada)  Four months after that, I went to my regular doctor for a check-up, including the usual blood work.  Years past, I was extremely Vitamin D deficient, not uncommon for an undiagnosed MS patient and something that needs to be checked regularly for a diagnosed patient.  I also have to have my liver checked routinely because of my medicine but haven’t had problems (knock on wood).  But for twenty years, the one thing that has always come back ‘at risk’ or worse is my cholesterol.  No matter what I did, it was always flagged for its levels.  This year was the first time since I was 22 years old that my cholesterol was considered normal.  I haven’t done anything new or different other than It Works!

Some people will think that this entry is self-serving, since I am an It Works! distributor.  But those people need to understand that I didn’t become a distributor and then decide it worked for me.  The reason I am an It Works! distributor is because of what it has done for me (and countless other people I have been privileged to help).  If you are remotely thinking of trying it, do it!  You have nothing to lose but so much to gain.

Make your mark

Recently a friend from high school was killed in a traffic accident.  I hadn't seen him since high school and only recently became Facebook friends with him.  It wasn't anything deep or "catching up" like, it was more, "Oh cool, I wonder what he's been doing for the last 20-some years."  But when I heard the news that he died, I cried. It was an unexpected, immediate reaction.  I hadn't talked to this man in forever and there I sat with tears streaming down my face.  I tried to figure out why this hit me so hard and in my introspection realized that his death was such an 'in-your-face' way of facing my own mortality.  I mean, I know I'm mortal; I cringe at the stupid and dangerous things I did as a kid and spend sleepless nights now that I have teenagers praying they don't do anything like that.  I was past the point of thinking I was invincible but was still at the "that only happens to old people, I've got time" stage of my life.  No more.  I wasn't trying to be selfish and make his death about me; I am so sad for everyone in his life -  his wife, his kids, his friends.  It was senseless and horrible and a waste of a wonderful man.  But I was caught off-guard at how sad I felt and now this week I have discovered that another friend from high school is sick with lung cancer that has spread and his prognosis is not good.  I haven't seen this friend either since graduation day a lifetime ago, but he's someone who has touched my life, played a part in it - someone I grew up with.  He actually punched me in the eye in third grade on the playground when I was teasing him.  He's a part of my childhood and here he is in a struggle for his life.  How do we go from being ready to take on the world to getting our ass kicked by the world in what feels like the blink of an eye?  What I'm realizing is that the old cliche 'life is short' is actually true.  Life really is short.  So instead of just saying it like a punchline, I need to live it like the truth that it is.  Next time I'm afraid of trying something out of my comfort zone I am going to picture those two men and realize that I have to do it - now.  I can't put it off until I'm skinnier or making more money or the kids have graduated or any other excuse I tell myself.  There is a motto in my company - T.N.T.  today, not tomorrow - that is going to be my motto.  That has to be my motto.  I can't just keep shaking my head every Wednesday when my friend posts "Happy Hump Day!" and wonder how another week has passed me by so quickly.  The majority of my life has been pretty unremarkable - why?  What am I waiting for?  What are you waiting for?

Paging Dr. Crazy...

I don't know about you, but when too many good things happen to me, or I begin to count my blessings, I get a little worried that proverbial other shoe is going to drop.  I am sitting on my deck this morning, in awe of the beauty surrounding me - the trees, the sun shining, the animals, the wind rustling in the leaves - and knowing my family is safe asleep with food in the fridge and water from the tap, I begin to think about the people who don't have these things.... and then I feel, I don't know?  Guilty? Unworthy?  Like something bad has to happen to balance out my good fortune?  Then I begin to freak myself out.  Maybe we shouldn't go on the river today - someone is going to get hurt.  Why is that?  Why am I able to accept the bad or sub-par more easily than the good or great in my life?  When crappy things happen to me, I don't sit around and think, "ok, now something really great is going to happen to balance that out."

I begin to wax even more poetic (at least in my own head) that maybe those thoughts keep me from reaching my full potential.  If I really think about it, that is what I should feel guilty about.  Not using all the gifts and talents God has given me to their greatest extent.  Then another voice creeps in my head... "Wow, that's pretty arrogant of you - thinking you have gifts and talents...God is going to humble you."  What the hell is wrong with me?!

**Que? Ya-nee-poo-nee-my-you!

My baby girl turned 15 on Tuesday.  As most of you know, she was adopted from Russia when she was almost 7.  Watching her blossom and grow has been the best thing I could have ever done for my soul.  She is a beautiful child, inside and out.  Learning English as a second language though is tough, yet she has persevered and done an amazing job mastering this crazy language.  But I have to admit, listening to her learn English provided many hours of entertainment.  So much so, that her dad used to write down her sayings on his phone.  We called them YoungestChild'sName-isms. Here are some examples... Enjoy!

• glove department = glove compartment; as in, "Dad, can you get me some napkins out of the glove department?"

• go fish = gold fish, as in, "My favorite crackers are go fish crackers."

• Border Control = Border Patrol  "Were they arrested by Border Control?"

• workin' on a stinker....she tried to keep up with her gross brothers, 'nuf said

• "(How) To Kill a Mockingbird"  Three summers ago, my kids had to read To Kill a Mockingbird for their summer project with me.  Every time she referenced the book, she always threw in the "How" in front of the title.

• dandrum = dandruff, as in, "I think I might have dandrum."

• "don't throw it at me hardly, throw it softly" when her dad was teaching her to play catch

• "no eye-er" when she was playing the basketball game of HORSE with her dad and her trick shot was one with her eyes closed, it was a "no eye-er"

• "This burger is big...like an 'Inside Out' burger."  instead of In-n-Out burger.

• "Out of the bloom (blue)"...  "It just hit me out of the bloom!"

• whoppers = loppers  When trimming trees, "do you need help with the whoppers, Dad?"

• "You know what....whippity-doo!"  She still says, "You know what?" when she's mad.  I think whippity-doo was supposed to be whoopity-doo!

• And my most favorite -ism; about 6 months after she arrived in the States, we went to Knott's Berry Farm and we were in line for a ride and the guy next to us STUNK, she turned to me and said quietly, "he no good smell."

We don't get very many -isms from her anymore.  It's almost a secret victory for KC and me when she says one now and she gets very offended when we giggle and will turn to her dad and say, "DO NOT WRITE THAT IN YOUR PHONE!"  Love that kid.  She's really more like a young lady now.  My, how time flies. It seems like only yesterday when, after I explained what "being pregnant" meant, she patted my stomach and asked, "oh, you have a baby in there?"  Like I said, love that kid.


**For those of you wondering about the headline... Que? = What? in Spanish and Ya-nee-poo-nee-my-you  is the phonetic version of saying, "I don't understand you" in Russian.

Feeling a little like Ann Landers on the Lion King soundtrack, but that's a good thing...

I have really missed blogging.  I decided not to put my thoughts down in print for a while because I was pretty angry with a parent who was making my life a living hell and really disappointed about how people with a higher pay grade than me handled it and I knew that anything I wrote was going to be laced with sarcasm and nastiness.  Not that sarcasm and nastiness don't have their place....I was just afraid it would consume me and I wouldn't be able to write anything but.  That would get old quickly and you wouldn't want to read, and I wouldn't want to write, my blog anymore so I decided to take a break until I was in a better place (mentally and physically!)

I am now in Michigan for the summer. Being here brings me a lot of peace and happiness.  Partly because I'm with my family, partly because I'm in the cooler weather and I feel a ton better (Arizona summer heat and MS do not mix), partly because I'm not dealing with horrible parents right now, and partly because I'm in my comfort zone; this is where I fit in and can be myself.  Although, since arriving in the state I grew up in, I have discovered that living in Tucson for 20 years has rubbed off on me and I have become more of a hippie than I realized.  And I'm not even embarrassed about it. (Don't worry, conservative ones, I still have some beliefs that balance me out.)  I'm also feeling energized because I have started a new adventure selling It Works! products.  I used them, loved them, and knew I would feel confident selling them.  I'm not going to try to convince you of the products' merits here but have found people's reactions, when learning of my new endeavor, fascinating.  Some aren't interested in learning about them right now, some are excited to use them, some think I'm hawking snake oil, and the one I find most odd - some seem to be threatened that I'm trying to change my station in life.  When I pondered this further, it seems there are always people who, whenever anyone wants to make a change for the better in their life, take the attitude of  "Who do you think you are? Don't upset the status quo."  Why is that?  I guess it's human nature, I'm sure I've been guilty of doing it but as I've been on the receiving end of that mentality recently, I've been (over) analyzing it and have decided that maybe people think there is a limited supply of good fortune.  I don't think there is a finite supply of success - or love; just because I am successful doesn't mean that I've taken that away from someone else. Nor if I love my husband with all my heart, does that mean that when my children came along, I had to love him less to be able to love them.  If anything, I think loving them made me love him more.  So, me really going for it with this opportunity and being successful will mean a windfall for me, as well as many people around me.  When I buy a new car, build a new house, need higher insurance limits, acquire beautiful art and furniture, hire a cleaning service, get more frequent haircuts, manicures and massages, go to yoga daily, travel more often, and donate more money to charity, many, many people benefit but I can't identify anyone who loses.  This is a good reminder for me.  When others accomplish their goals, I don't lose.  If anything, I win because they will be more apt to try my products (and when they try them, they'll love them and will continue to buy them!  sorry, couldn't resist.) so it's important to root for everyone!  It keeps the good energy circle going - the circle I want to be a part of.  So good luck to any of you contemplating change.  I wish you success and will be genuinely happy for you when you achieve it!  Now go out and do it!  Another good reminder for me.

Still flare free.... bummer?

Today was my bi-annual neurologist appointment.  After answering my usual page worth of questions that I have thought of in between visits, my doctor proceeds with the normal exam....

Follow my finger, look at my nose - can you see my fingers moving (as he moves them almost out of my peripheral vision), squeeze my fingers, pull my arms, and my least favorite, touch my finger - your nose - then my finger again.

I hate that one because if I've had caffeine that day, my finger shakes and he will say with glee, "uh oh, you have a tremor - we need to watch that."  No doc, I just have a Diet Coke addiction.... I purposefully didn't have a soda at lunch and breezed through the routine with no tremor.  I notice him frowning.  I then have to do the drunk walk - walk a straight line, heel to toe.  "Your balance is perfect," he begrudgingly remarks and then he pulls out the reflex hammer and I know what's coming.  Before I was diagnosed, KC used to hit my knee and laugh hysterically because it would go flying.  We couldn't go anywhere in the car without him doing it to me so when the doctor taps my knees, I notice KC watching longingly.  My legs kick out wildly, as usual.  "That's the MS," he says cheerfully.  Yeah, I know; I guilted KC into not tapping my knees five appointments ago, when you first told me.  Poor Kase, those days are gone, buddy.

We discuss when my next MRI should be and he sadly remarks that I've been flare-free for almost three years and don't need another one for at least two more years, "unless you have another flare sooner," he says hopefully.  But then he sighs and adds, "Other than your reflexes, you are completely without symptoms."  Why the disappointment, doc?  I want to tell him that sometimes there are days that I actually even forget I have MS but instead I feel obliged to say, "I know, I feel great but I worry there is a flare coming around the corner."  He perks up.  "You're probably right," he replies.  But then, he adds the obligatory, "but things look really good, so you could go for a long time without having one."  I swear I heard him say under his breath, "but it's doubtful."  Let's just order the wheelchair now.

After the appointment, KC and I debrief.  Strangely, he didn't see the appointment transpire that way.  "Great news, huh?  Let's go celebrate." So glad he surprised me by showing up at the appointment or I'd have come home and crawled into bed.  The appointment really did go well, but I won't be satisfied until he tells me I'm cured or at least, don't ever have to worry about another flare.  I think KC knows that and that's why he showed up.  So instead of crawling into bed, I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family.  I liked that so much better.  Besides, my birthday is in two days so there will be plenty of time for crawling into bed with the covers over my head in full-on pity party mode.